18 Jul 2019by taliatuck
My Disney World Vacation
I’m like two months late but I went to Disney World in May. I could talk about all of the stuff I did, but I’m sure you already know. If you’re a human person, you’ve seen a movie set there or you’ve seen a commercial or maybe you’ve traipsed around it on Google Maps. Who knows? Who cares. But I do want to give you some tips because I learned a few things while on vacation. So here we go:
- Watch your damn ankles: You will either roll your ankles stepping in the trolley tracks or tripping on the cobble stones. Or some soccer mom who has never been on vacation before and has saved up for an entire year will take you OUT with her stroller. Your ankles are getting taken tf out no matter what you do. I have no tips for this other than to watch out when you see Karen coming towards you with her 6-year-old, in a stroller, who has suddenly forgotten how to walk.
- Check your app all day: If you couldn’t wake up at 6 am to reserve the fast passes 6 months in advance then you’re like me. But if you wait until the day you’re in the park and you keep refreshing the app at around 2 pm, you will see fast passes start to free up. This is how I rode the Avatar Flight of Passage Ride, which had a wait of over 3 hours. I sipped on margaritas in the 90-degree heat and then bopped in front of people who had waited nearly 4 hours in the sun. I didn’t feel bad about it. I did. Actually, no. Not really.
- Make friends with people who work there: I befriend two bartenders/cashiers and they gave me invaluable information on how to get on the rides I wanted, the best times to do things, how to secure fast passes, and how to get the most magic out of Disney possible. Also, you won’t be a dick if you just strike up a conversation with a service person who has to watch ass holes on vacation all day while they themselves are boiling in the heat.
That’s it. You’re welcome. Also, I didn’t get a picture with Kylo Ren so I’m sad forever.